Tuesday, 27 January 2009

It's Classic Mass...

Post-Latin Mass Interview hosted by Franciscan Friar

"Congratulations on a marvellous result. How do you think that went, Ron?"

"Well, you know, at the end of the day, I can't complain. The boys gave 110% out there, I can't ask for much more. At the end of the day, there were three altar servers and a Priest out there fighting for Sacred Tradition against the weight of so many stubborn Bishops dragging their feet. We just got into our game and there was little they could do to stop us. I'm proud of the lads. Some of the Bishops were blocking us for a while, you know, they have a formidable defence, a 'magic circle' if you like, but we just kept hammering away at it and in the end, got the result we were after."

"But you came away with a cracking result and what a sublime finish at the end there at the 'Ite Missa Est'. Can you take us through that one more time? We've got it here on slow motion action replay."

"Yes, as you can see, I turned on a sixpence having finished cleaning the Sacred Vessels, faced the congregation and gave them the Dismissal, telling them Mass was ended in Latin. The crowd loved it. It was like 1966 all over again. Magic stuff, you know, as a Priest, you live for times like this. Great Mass, cracking finish, and many of the crowd stayed behind afterwards for more prayer, which is always a good sign. Pure poetry."

"This puts you in a great position for the rest of the season. Where do you think you'll be at the end of the liturgical year?"

"Well, I shouldn't pontificate, but yes, well, you know, we've still got the Holy Father to come back from injury after that SSPX scare, nasty metatarsal from that awful Williamson challenge, but he's come through it well and the Physio is wonderful. I think in time people will see the wisdom there of leaving Fellay and Williamson out for a while, loose cannons, mavericks if you will, but then gradually bringing them back into the Fold and gently healing the rifts. But, you know, the number XVI is our big hitter and I don't think at the end of the season, there will be anyone to challenge us."

"You're really knocking back all-comers when it comes to the Cup."

"Yes, yes, well we're concentrating on the Divine League, 'Sponsored by Sacred Species Under One Kind', you know, and I think you'll find us on top at the end, challenging for honours and Blessed Hosting a sensational victory for true piety, reverence and heartfelt devotion."

"Great stuff, at one point there I thought your backs were really up against it."

"Yes, they were, but sometimes when it looks like your backs are up against it, really, you know, you're all facing the same way, towards the Lord. You know, why go West when you can face East? "Keep facing East!" That's what I tell the lads, and they just respond in kind. If it was good enough for the Early Christians it is good enough for us. It's a different formation, you know, a new system, not what the lads are used to, but we've had good advice that it will work and as you can see, its already paying dividends."

"There was one point there when the crowd were literally on their knees, silent in holy prayer, literally waiting for the Precious Body of Christ, like hungry lambs."

"Yes, well when Holy Mass is done so attentively to remind people they're in the Presence of God, that's what happens. But you know, I can't take all the credit, the boys have given it their all and you've got to say the Almighty played a huge role in this Mass too, coming down from on High and really rescuing us from a lot of trouble, redeeming us when really we didn't deserve it and sustaining us with His Salvific Love, under the guise of bread."

"Marvellous stuff...People are saying your team are similar to the Tridentine team of the 1950s and some are even calling this brand of Mass, 'Total Mass'. Many are unfamiliar with it and others say they haven't seen Mass done so beautifully and reverently since the early 60s in those heady halcyon days of Pius X, who as we all know was a great Leader and Shepherd."

"Yes, you know, we're trying our best. We take a leaf out of his book, you know. We agree with his belief that, "Mass isn't a matter of life and death, it's more important than that: its the Lord's Death and Resurrection." We practice a lot on the training ground, but when the boys know what they're doing, it all flows. Great team work and you can really see that connection with the will of the Holy and Immortal God, and the sense that yes, the Sacrifice of the Mass comes right from Heaven. This was how it was meant to be done and we'll just keep working hard on pleasing God and things should hopefully work out for us."

"An Extraordinary claim, but then it was Mass in the Extraordinary Form and I don't think you'll have too many doubters this evening. Great result, Ron. I'm sure they'll be dancing in the streets of the Vatican tonight. Not sure about Eccesleton Square though...."

"Cheers. A lot of people didn't give us a prayer a few seasons ago when we got His Holiness Pope Benedict XVI on a transfer after his stalwart and inspirational predecessor, Pope John Paul the Great, but you have to say the man has star quality. He's our talisman, our lynchpin, our Rock and I think we can trust him to guide us safely to honours and glory. He really digs in, gets stuck in when times are hard and he's sharp you know, clever, prudent and wise. He's got vision. You can't buy that stuff, you know, its Heaven sent. Who knows? Next year, maybe bigger and better things. This Mass is getting really popular now and who knows, maybe next year, we'll be running encyclicals around all the competition. It would be nice to put a string of Latin Masses together and go on a long unbeaten run for a while."

"Is there anyone you want to dedicate this Mass to?"

"Yes, that was for the People of the Parish."

"Well, Rome will certainly be taking these boys seriously now. Over to you, Trevor, from a stunning Mass here which left many of the congregation breathless and when there were many who doubted too. However, in the end it really was a case of 'It'll be Old Rite on the night.'"

1 comment:

Anonymous said...


The Only Safe Space in the World

Virus normalcy, the so-called 'new normal', is for Christians almost certainly more abhorrent than it is for people of other reli...