Saturday 11 December 2010

Breaking News...Cancun Saves Planet!

Greenpeace activists show what global warming would have done...
Great news! The leaders of the World, having got together in a beach resort in Mexico (I think we can assume they all flew, mostly first class, obviously), have saved the World from global warming! Thanks be to God! Or is that the Mayan goddess? It doesn't really matter at the end of the day because Cancun can save us!

Now we can all relax, safe in the knowledge that no natural disasters will ever take place in the future again!  Brighton, Hove and possibly Worthing at least, are saved! Northumberland is saved! Yes! Swanage, Bournemouth and Weymouth are saved! It might cost every taxpayer more in carbon taxes but think about it, we can all sleep safe at night now. Praise God!

Just think about it. If those 15,000 delegates had not flown over to that Mexican resort, at considerable cost to the public purses of the nations of the World, the Greenpeace campaign image above shows us exactly what would have happened. If they had not reached an agreement today on reducing carbon emissions, the Christ the Redeemer statue in Rio de Janiero would have been half-way under water within years and that is an undisputed scientific fact. If you don't agree with that fact, you probably need your head seen to, or you deserve to be exploded in public.

May Almighty God bless each and every one of those 15,000 delegates, who, without doubt, will have almost certainly postponed the Apocalypse by years, surely, because if there is one thing we humans can control, its Almighty God and the whole of His Creation! I mean, its not as if the whole of the Universe is sustained by God's power, hanging, as it were, by the fine, golden thread of God's unfathomable mercy (h/t G.K. Chesterton), or anything like that. Now we can all sleep safe.

Honestly, give these delegates a year or two and they'll be wanting to change the colour and temperature of the Sun, because, er, it's too red, it's too hot, it seems to have a mind of its own and keeps emitting these frighteningly large coronal mass ejections towards Earth, knocking global power grids out of action. Gosh! Now, that would really reduce carbon emissions! Still, it's genuinely scary because millions of people would could die...Let's try throwing water at it!

1 comment:

Mike said...

Politico is somewhat underwhelmed by the achievements of Cancun:
http://www.politico.com/news/stories/1210/46269.html

But, of course, if one of these conferences ever actually achieved anything tangible (which would be bad news, by the way) then there would be no more opportunities for galavanting at public expense for all these delegates. And spare a thought for all the NGO delegates. What would be left go these poor souls to do?

No, it is vital that each of these conferences achieves only enough for the delegates to be able to say that they achieved something but that more needs to be done – at the next conference.

But remember Gordon Brown telling us 50 days before Copenhagen that we only had 50 days left to save the planet?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pyZEC__hfQk
He also told us that there is no Plan B. Well, after Copenhagen we had Cancun and after Cancun we will have somewhere in South Africa. Plan B followed by Plan C, followed by….

By the way, Michael Voris at RealCatholicTV has an hour-long presentation highlighting the weaknesses and dangers in the climate alarmist cause:
http://www.realcatholictv.com/free/index.php?vidID=ciax-2010-08-25&ssnID=88

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