England World Cup 2010 Song

I am yet to see or hear of an official World Cup song for England this year. Every four years our national team is assembled out of a Premier League of teams comprising of largely foreign talent, only for our national cream to be exposed as a bit useless.

New managers come and go, new stars emerge but, at the end of the day, the nation gasps once more in horror that the majority of players in our World cup team can't string five passes together and inevitably lose doggedly to a superior team with natural talent. But, who knows, with a shrewd Italian at the helm, with an absurd amount of luck and as long as each of our team is given a personal Dyson bladeless fan to carry around while on the sweltering South African pitch, everything is possible. So, here is my effort at an official England World Cup song.

We're En-ger-land

Every four years its always the same
We claim that football is our national game
We gather some over-paid professional stars
And watch them sky penalties over the bar

We're En-ger-land
We're En-ger-land

Every four years its always the same
World Cup fever with Rio and Wayne
But we never get into the World Cup final
The whole team is injured and believe me its spinal

We're En-ger-land
We're En-ger-land

Every four years its the same in the end
Italians score one then sit back and defend
We haven't the grace of Brazil or Argentina
If our team was a car it would be a Ford Cortina

We're En-ger-land
We're En-ger-land

Every four years its always the same
We go out in the quarters the boss takes the blame
This time we're playing in a murder capital of a State
We're gonna get murdered anyhow so what difference does it make?

We're En-ger-land
We're En-ger-land

What our team lacks in talent it makes up for in money,
Fast cars, adultery and abortions quick hurry
Our team doesn't pray they play like dogs dinners
Brazil love Jesus that's why they are winners

We're En-ger-land
We're En-ger-land


Trainspotter said…
I wish to God that homosexuality *were* a sin. Then I could repent of it, be absolved, do penance and make a fresh start with God’s help and His grace. Instead, God has chosen to give me a hideous, vile, cancerous inner desire upon which I do not act and have never acted, but which not only makes me loathsome to myself but would make me loathsome to anyone else who came to know of it. It is a cross I bear every day, but it is to no purpose.

I love God and try to serve Him, but I am forced to recognise that He does not love me, otherwise He would not have created me with this filthy infliction.
If you have suffered and continue to suffer with your Cross then know that your merits are known to God and they are far greater than mine, since I have acted upon it and more than once.

This life is a vale of tears and any homosexual who desire to be faithful to Christ knows that especially. The loneliness of the Cross, the bitterness of self-denial and the longing to be loved are ever present.

You will sell your fidelity at a great price on the Last Day and holy perseverence will win you a crown of Glory.

That said, we cannot climb this holy mountain alone or by our own efforts.

You are greatly loved by God whose mercy and love are greater than any sin. His love for you is beyond measure. If you should ever stumble and fall, remember that God is faithful to us even if we are unfaithful to Him. No man on earth can judge you or condemn you and Christ Himself said that he did not come to condemn the World, but to save it.

Above all, do not give way to despair, Satan's greatest weapon, whether you be chaste or give into your temptation, for Our Blessed Lord has prepared a place in Heaven for those who love Him.

Keep good and holy company, frequent the Sacraments of Penance and the Holy Eucharist often and pray, as I sure you do. It pains me greatly that you do not feel loved by Christ, since as gay men, we know about shame, the shame for which Our Saviour died and took upon Himself.

Our condition, disorder, affliction, whatever you wish to call it comes from the Fall and other factors beyond our control.

Yet, Christ has called us into a relationship of love with Him. We are called to be angels of God's peace and Messengers of His Love. You and I are called to be Saints. Our calling is a high one indeed.

Take courage, Trainspotter, dear Brother.
Rusticus said…
Laurence - what a wonderful reply.

Trainspotter - God really does love you; and I shall remember you in my prayers.

God bless you both. Pray for me too, a sinner.