Gordon Brown's Big Brother

He looks like Gordon, sounds like Gordon, makes the same hand gestures as Gordon and he is watching you. Especially all you single mothers. Oh yes! It's off to Care Homes for you so you can raise your children under constant supervision of the State. Don't rely on your family, your parents or grandparents for help. It's for your own good and for society's good!

So, remember single mothers, if you decide to have your baby at 16, and that's a big if, given that you're going to be shunted into a Moat housing estate if you do, surrounded by men and women watching you like hawks, that Big Brother Gordon and Gordon's Care Homes will be here for you...waiting...and watching...and waiting!...but mostly watching! Cracking. Either this idea will halve teen pregnancies and instill a mindset of abstinence in the young or abortions are about to skyrocket because it will soon become apparant that Social Services are watching the single mothers so intently and waiting for them to make a mistake so intently, because they want to find any excuse they can to give their children to gay couples who want to adopt.

And, is it just me, or is Gordon Brown courting the BNP vote?



That'll be a yes then. That repulsive flag is back! Yep! It must be a recession!

Brown: "Mandy! It's an emergency! We're shafted at the next election? What are we going to do!?"

Mandelson: "It's time to wheel out the big guns,Gordy. I want you to stand in front of the Union Jack and appeal to a sense of national pride, because, my man...it's all we have left. Oh, and do as much as you can to appeal to the middle classes. Convince them that its all the fault of the very rich and lazy and the very poor and lazy and that 'honest, hard working Brits' are the guys you want to help. Believe me, Gord. This has NEVER been known to fail. We need Daily Mail readers! Yep! All those people who hate us because we've Ed Ballsed up the nation's civil liberties - we need them now and what is more, we need them quicker than a Big Mac at a Drive Thru, because The Sun have just kneed us in the knackers so hard this Party won't be walking for days, possibly weeks!"

Everyone knows The Sun are kingmakers. I wish I could feel sorry for the Labour Party, but I'll be as glad to see the back of them as I was seeing the Tories get their behinds whipped out of power last time they were in. Power corrupts, they say, and let's face it, that was 1997. It didn't take long for power to corrupt the Labour Party after the wilderness years. I doubt very much the Tories will have learned their lesson, but still, a change is as good, if not better, than a rest. Most people, I think, hated the Tories back in 1997 because they were just seen as being a bit mean to the poor and needy, ordinary workers too, a bit like old Scrooge. Hence Cameron does his, 'Hey, everybody! I'm nice!' act.

The Labour Party, if they lose the next election will probably go away licking their wounds and take everything into stock and decide that the biggest mistake they made was that they didn't interfere in people's lives enough. I saw a cavalcade tonight, one sleek black car, with police motorbikes and a couple of cars behind and in front of it, while I was driving around in town and I thought to myself, '**** me! How's anyone in a car like that, with all that security going to have a clue what's going on on the ground in communities in the UK?' Fact is, he, whoever he is, PM or not, doesn't have a clue because their lives are totally divorced from ours, which is exactly what we were talking about after Mass today. Anyway...