Saturday, 17 January 2009

The Catholic Response to Jehovah's Witnesses


A Jehovah's Witness knocks at your door. Do you:

a) Not answer.
b) Invite them in for tea and biscuits.
c) Tell them to renounce their heresy and that there is no salvation outside of the Church.
d) Politely tell them you are Catholic and believe in the teachings of Holy Mother Church, but thank you anyway.
e) Shower the witnesses with Rosaries from your window.
f) Tell them there is not enough time to talk as you have to go to hospital for an urgent blood transfusion.
g) Tell them you are not in.
h) Tell them that you've mathematically deduced that Heaven is probably full now, as there must have been at least 144,000 Jehovah's Witnesses who have already lived and died and now enjoy the Beatific Vision and you fear we are out of time.
i) Tell them that you'd love to chat, but you've hunkered down in the house with 10,000 cans of tinned spaghetti just in case the Apocolypse is around the corner and you literally can't open the door because you've put the wardrobe there.
j) Tell them you have a stack of spare Papal Encyclicals lying around in the flat, could you have their address so you can pop round one day.
k) Tell them it was divinely revealed to you in a dream last night that Barry Manilow is the prophet we have all been waiting for and that yes, he is 'the One'.
l) Invite them in and tell them you'd love to join Jehovah's Witnesses but you've just this second started a cult of your own, and ask if they'd like to join your one, while pouring petrol on your furniture and striking a match.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

it depends; Sometimes I do say we're Catholic and no thanks. They do tend to arrive at bad times.
But I have had some conversations with them.
My oldest son discussed purgatory with them once and pointed out how joyful that was -as well as Sctiptural- compared to their "miserable view of life".
"I can't give up my joy and hope for your misery." he told them.
They left at that point.
Don't know what they made of it.

I did have a friend in the JWs but she was hard to talk to. The fact is she believed that the three of us she worked with; me a Catholic. Mo the Muslim and Sue the Evangelical - were all hell bound.
How could she get around that and maintain a friendship with us? She couldn't. I felt sorry for her. She was not a happy lady.

God bless

madame evangelista said...

mum6kids - that's quite impressive as Jehovah's Witnesses don't actually believe in hell. Are you sure she wasn't really a Catholic having you on? lol

JamesP said...

Ours arrived while I was trimming the hedge so I arranged for them to come back another time.

We invite them in, give them a cup of tea, hear what they have to say and take their leaflets.

They spend all day being told to sod off, so they thing we are amazingly nice and wonderful. We explain the problems we have with their beliefs in a really nice gentle way (that sounds really good but what about this?) and let's see what happens. They keep coming back anyway.

So (a) I suppose, eventually followed by (d).

Anonymous said...

Madame
She believed in the 144k being saved and that was it. I know JWs have changed their beliefs on this since then.
I have met an Anglican who didn't believe in hell. I have met Catholic's who don't believe in it either.
I doubt all JWs believe the same thing. SOme of them will change tack in one conversation!

PeterHWright said...

Many years ago, I was in a railway compartment with a C. of E. parson, a Jehovah's Witness, and a commercial traveller.

The Jehovah's Witness held forth for some time, and gave us each a pamphlet.

I suppose I should have said (d), but I said (c), while the C. of E. parson said (h).

The commercial traveller very sensibly said nothing and went off to the bar.

leutgeb said...

I go for d, but Fr Tim says keep them talking so they aren't knocking on other people's doors!

I always think I'm too late for the 144k bit.

Anonymous said...

I tried (d) once and was promptly presented with a leaflet on so- called Catholicism which was full of rubbish statements.

I did wonder whether they had leaflets for ever religion to hand out in this way!

I don't like not answering the doorbell
as you never know who it may be
but I do find that a quick 'Are you Jehovah's Witnesses' before they have even started to speak works for me. They are a bit taken aback as to how I had guessed. The fact that there are two of them close up to the door is always a good clue!I then tell them that I am not interested thank you and shut the door. A quick, sort of polite response without being rude.

33

33 The really, terribly embarrassing book of Mr Laurence James Kenneth England. Pray for me, a poor and miserable sinner, the most criminal ...