Saturday, 5 December 2009

New Brighton LGBT Society



Well, enough of this Climate Change b*llocks. What with the PM, Gordon Brown weighing into the debate with Ed Miliband and denouncing anyone who doesn't buy the official line that the 'science is settled' (now that its been fiddled), as a 'flat-Earther', it doesn't look like it matters who says the forthcoming global warming reign of terror is a manufactured crock of sh*te, the powers that be are going to do what they want anyway, regardless what the critics say, even if some of them are eminent climatologists.

Instead, I've decided to divert my energies to prayer and Mass attendance...alright, just Mass attendance. For even if the globowarmistas don't understand that only prayer, penance and beautiful liturgy can save the World, at least we Catholics do. Who knows, perhaps we can even do penance on behalf of these lying, population-reducing scumbags. It is with this in mind that I've taken it upon myself to set up a new LGBT society in the heart of Brighton.

We LGBT people have for too long been disregarded. After all, the Catechism of the Catholic Church states categorically that no discrimination should be shown to us and our plight should be treated with respect, dignity and compassion. Therefore, Brighton is now resident to the first Latin, Gregorian, Benedictine and Traditional (LGBT) society.

It is free to join and anyone can become a member. Our mission statement reads as follows:

We are an umbrella organisation standing up for the rights of those in the Christian community who for too long have faced unjust discrimination in their regard.

  • Latinians, made famous by the island of Latbos, near Italy, just want to show their love for God and worship Him as they feel He should be worshipped, in spirit and in truth, using the language most sacred and holy in His Sight. For too long, the Latinians have felt suppressed by the Church community and many feel the sense of 'forbidden love' in the current Church structure. One important figure who is on their side is Pope Benedict XVI, gloriously reigning, who allowed the Latinians to express their desire for God through the Latin Mass, by issuing the Motu Proprio, encouraging Bishops and Priests to liberate the Mass of Ages.
  • The Gregorian community, on the other hand, have faced similar discrimination to the Latinians, sometimes more severe, with their 'inordinate desire' to praise God through the medium of chant. Many in the Church feel that this is an 'instrinsic disorder' and that God should be praised through the use of electric guitars, drums and one man dressed in a leotard playing a tuba. While the LGBT group respects those who enjoy this form of worship, if not the form of worship itself, we demand the right to be able to give due reverence for God in the Blessed Sacrament and praise Him in a worthy manner as did the Saints of old in Gregorian Chant.
  • The Benedictine community are a group of Catholics who rejoice at the Pontificate of Pope Benedict XVI, raise awareness of his outstanding efforts to restore the liturgy of the Church to its former glory and reign in the excesses of those who flagrantly disregarded well over 1500 years of Holy Tradition when the 'windows of the Church' were opened in the wake of Vatican II, only to let in a load of flies. The Benedictine community have suffered unjust discrimination from such publications as The Tablet, liberal Priests, Bishops and celebrity Laity, as has their figurehead, Pope Benedict XVI. The Benedictine community show due loyalty to the Holy Father, read every encyclical he writes and defend him in pubs and on blogs when he says something about condoms, while everyone else puts the boot in.
  • The Traditional community are those who feel they struggle with their identity within the Church and who, for nearly 50 years have found it difficult to be accepted. The Traditional community hold as sacred the Tradition of the Church, the communion of the Saints, the lives of the Saints, honour the Blessed Mother of God, the Sacraments of the Church and strive to live in communion with Church teaching. They abhor heresy, are pro-Life, proclaim firmly the importance of the maleness of the Priest and his sacred role as mediator between man and God.

We, the LGBT community of Brighton believe our voices have been unheard for a long time and it is time the Church listened to us, that Bishops and Priests pull their fingers out and liberate the Latin Mass, that reverence is shown to the Most Holy Sacrament of the Altar and that the liturgical abuses taking place within Holy Mother Church are mitigated by courageous men who are loyal to Our Blessed Lady, Our Lord Jesus Christ, the Church as built upon the Rock of St Peter and his successor, Pope Benedict XVI.

2 comments:

me said...

I can see you are going to have quite a lot of fun with this new society!

sandy said...

I like this!

33

33 The really, terribly embarrassing book of Mr Laurence James Kenneth England. Pray for me, a poor and miserable sinner, the most criminal ...