Saturday, 8 November 2008

Toilet with Inbuilt Fishtank



If I ever manage to climb out of the financial abyss that is my overdraft, or come into any money, this will be the second thing I will buy. The first thing I buy will be a bed. I just composed a little poem about my current situation.

Lady Poverty

Lady Poverty paid me a visit last night
She spoke with great fervour and I woke with a fright
She said, “I visit the poor to show that God cares.”
I said, “That’s lovely would you happen to have a spare
Three thousand pounds?”
She said, “No I don’t, but what I do have is free.
God loves you my child, and God loves me.”
I said, “Lady, you’re beautiful, your words are well crafted
It’s so comforting to know that God knows I’m shafted.”

Lady Poverty paid me a visit last night
She told me God's favour rests on her in His sight
She said, "It's not money you need but grace upon grace"
I said, "Many men have never seen your beautiful face
More precious than emeralds and gold"
She said, "No, they haven't but then they don't want to see.
God loves you my child and God loves me."
I said, "Lady you're wonderful, your wisdom sublime
Perhaps after all I don't need a dime."

Lady Poverty paid me a visit last night
She told me Heaven is aware of my unfortunate plight
She said, "God knows you have trouble with overdraft charges
But remember where your treasure is 'cos that's where your heart is."
I said, "If I paid all my debts and my balance was zero.
That wouldn't make me happy and it wouldn't make me a hero
In Heaven's eyes."
She said, "Oh child, God loves you whether you are near or far
But believe me when I tell you, you're going to have to sell your car."

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