Leaked Documents Disclose Ambitions of Potential Successor to Pope Francis
We've had Blessed John XXIII the Smiling, Blessed John Paul II the Great, we're now in the reign of Pope Saint Francis the Humble I and, thankfully, everybody's forgotten about the papal abberation that was German, 'Ratzinger the Regrettable', who came between the second and the fourth with his unique but much disdained blend of Nazi ideology and antiquated theological notions, based loosely on the sad, crypto-lefebrevistic, self-absorbed, neo-promethean, pelagian, restorationist ideas of old maid bronze age goat herdsmen.
Already, the people are asking who could possibly succeed Pope Francis the Humble I. Who can work the crowds like Francis? Who can possibly be more humble and fantastic than Francis the Humble? Who could possibly fill those black shoes? Who has the humility, but the ambition also to take over from the man who crushed the dissenting, schismatic followers of the German Pope whose name was scratched out of the official Vatican list of Pontiffs?
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Already, the people are asking who could possibly succeed Pope Francis the Humble I. Who can work the crowds like Francis? Who can possibly be more humble and fantastic than Francis the Humble? Who could possibly fill those black shoes? Who has the humility, but the ambition also to take over from the man who crushed the dissenting, schismatic followers of the German Pope whose name was scratched out of the official Vatican list of Pontiffs?
Next…